hello you, i feel like i dont know you anymore. i guess somewhere along the way, i've lost wanting to make an effort.

i get that you want to do well for your studies and that you'd much rather make the most of the day to study. well, i feel the same way too. can you not tell the disappointment that i have, each time we cancel our meetings? well, reading your blog only made me realise how much im no longer a part of your life... and you know what, its okay. we're in different schools now, i cant talk to you each day and hang out with you all the time, but its okay. just for that one day, i'd wish you had some time to spare. after reading your blog, i've just realised that maybe you treasure others more than you treasure me. am i mad? hell yea, why does it always seem to me that this friendship is one-sided. can you understand how i feel? msgs that are left unreplied, meetings that are cancelled and problems unheard of. you've disappeared from my life... and its just a sucky feeling.

just last week, i had a major breakdown. i needed a listening ear, i needed to be around ppl that made me happy, so where were you?

i still love you a lot, i'll still be there for you no matter what. but sometimes, its hard to understand why things are the way it is now. i'm sure you have no idea about what i truly feel and maybe its my fault for not telling you. but how can i? its too difficult. you're still very much a part of my life. im just hoping that maybe im in yours too.

these past few days have been awesome. been to simpang bedok and orchard and i've got plans for tmr and tues and wed and fri.. AND SO MUCH MORE FUN TO COME. i've finally got around to cleaning my room. a lot of stuff had been piled up during the jcts period and i cleared it today! YAY! it took my damn long as well, but im happy that its clean! clean! clean!
im really relieved its over, and i dont even want to bring myself to think of the word "prelims". EWWW! i feel like finally i can go out with nothing yelling at the back of my head for me to get to work... studying.

i realise that im missing drama loads. the late night rehearsals, the crazy gossip, the physical work, the dancing, the singing, THE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF PARTS, the make up, the people, OH YES THE PEOPLE. gosh. WOW. i felt like we were just casted yesterday.

anyways, i was seriously quite pissed today. i just feel that some ppl are just plain rude. i know the message says "sms xx if coming" BUT HONESTLY, IF I TOOK THE EFFORT TO SMS PEOPLE AND PLAN AN OUTING. isnt it basic courtesy to reply if you're coming. GOSH, im never gonna try to plan a class outing. go ahead and plan one yourselves. it seems like there's only 5 of us tmr... BUT ITS OKAY. becos, we just gossip bout ppl. and its always difficult to gossip in a large group. so well, we'll just see!